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vocab_drabblesTitle: 'Six for Defenestration'
Fandom: Friends
Author:but_can_i_be_trusted
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 400
Characters/Pairings: Ross Geller, Monica Geller, Chandler Bing, Joey Tribbiani, Rachel Greene, Phoebe Buffay
Warnings: Language; mention of contemplated murder
Notes: Crossposted toemotion100 and whatif_au
Summary: "You're making a lot of sense, there."
The revolution had been fought. The revolution had been won. Now, the only difficulty was to tie up the loose ends.
"Alright," Ross announced, banging his fist on the table, in lieu of a gavel. The others quickly fell into order. "We're ready to make the decision. How do we dispose of Mister Smug and Superior Dictator?"
Rachel leaned back in her seat, idly filing her nails. "Whatever you guys want to do with our deposed leader is fine with me," she yawned.
"Let's defenestrate the bastard," Phoebe shouted, rising to her feet.
Joey, beside her, stood, as well. "I second," he yelled, caught up in the wake of her enthusiasm. "Uh...whatever 'defenestrate' means," he embarrassedly added.
Over beside Ross, Chandler jotted it down. "So, that's two for throwing 'the bastard' out the window, and one undecided." He glanced around. "If we go that route, though, I recommend finding a higher window than any of these." He motioned to the windows all around them in the chamber, on what was the structure's only story. "A drop of only a few feet isn't much of an execution."
"It'd only work if he fell just right," Monica agreed. "As our former dictator's former personal chef, I could recommend poisoning his next meal. It's quieter, and more likely to produce a fast result, if I choose the right one."
"But how do we know he didn't build up an immunity to whatever poison you used," Rachel asked.
Cringing, Monica pointed at her. "You're making a lot of sense, there."
Rachel smirked. "I'm not a total idiot."
"Why not just put him in front of a firing squad," Joey asked.
Phoebe swatted him. "Hey! No voting for more than one method," she scolded.
He rubbed his arm, pouting. "Fine. I take it back. No on the firing squad. We'll stick with that window thing you came up with."
"We could let him rot in prison," Ross suggested. "But that'd be too slow. And it's possible that his factions could restructure themselves, free him, and wind us up right back where we started."
Chandler spoke up. "Guys, while the six of us are trying and failing to make up our minds, it's also possible that the dictator's already dead of old age. If we don't take firm, decisive action now, then we might as well give everything up."
"Six for defenestration, then," Ross asked.
Fandom: Friends
Author:
but_can_i_be_trustedRating: PG-13
Word Count: 400
Characters/Pairings: Ross Geller, Monica Geller, Chandler Bing, Joey Tribbiani, Rachel Greene, Phoebe Buffay
Warnings: Language; mention of contemplated murder
Notes: Crossposted to
emotion100 and whatif_auSummary: "You're making a lot of sense, there."
The revolution had been fought. The revolution had been won. Now, the only difficulty was to tie up the loose ends.
"Alright," Ross announced, banging his fist on the table, in lieu of a gavel. The others quickly fell into order. "We're ready to make the decision. How do we dispose of Mister Smug and Superior Dictator?"
Rachel leaned back in her seat, idly filing her nails. "Whatever you guys want to do with our deposed leader is fine with me," she yawned.
"Let's defenestrate the bastard," Phoebe shouted, rising to her feet.
Joey, beside her, stood, as well. "I second," he yelled, caught up in the wake of her enthusiasm. "Uh...whatever 'defenestrate' means," he embarrassedly added.
Over beside Ross, Chandler jotted it down. "So, that's two for throwing 'the bastard' out the window, and one undecided." He glanced around. "If we go that route, though, I recommend finding a higher window than any of these." He motioned to the windows all around them in the chamber, on what was the structure's only story. "A drop of only a few feet isn't much of an execution."
"It'd only work if he fell just right," Monica agreed. "As our former dictator's former personal chef, I could recommend poisoning his next meal. It's quieter, and more likely to produce a fast result, if I choose the right one."
"But how do we know he didn't build up an immunity to whatever poison you used," Rachel asked.
Cringing, Monica pointed at her. "You're making a lot of sense, there."
Rachel smirked. "I'm not a total idiot."
"Why not just put him in front of a firing squad," Joey asked.
Phoebe swatted him. "Hey! No voting for more than one method," she scolded.
He rubbed his arm, pouting. "Fine. I take it back. No on the firing squad. We'll stick with that window thing you came up with."
"We could let him rot in prison," Ross suggested. "But that'd be too slow. And it's possible that his factions could restructure themselves, free him, and wind us up right back where we started."
Chandler spoke up. "Guys, while the six of us are trying and failing to make up our minds, it's also possible that the dictator's already dead of old age. If we don't take firm, decisive action now, then we might as well give everything up."
"Six for defenestration, then," Ross asked.
