but_can_i_be_trusted: from the Wayne & Shuster 'Art Gallery' pantomime sketch (Cone Man)
[personal profile] but_can_i_be_trusted posting in [community profile] vocab_drabbles
Title: 'On The Other Foot'
Fandom: Friends
Author: [personal profile] but_can_i_be_trusted
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 300
Characters/Pairings: Phoebe Buffay, Rachel Greene
Warnings: Brief demonstrative self-harm
Notes: Crossposted to [community profile] emotion100 and [community profile] whatif_au
Summary: While Phoebe wasn't the type to snap, she couldn't always be predicted.

"Hey, Rach? I have a confession to make. It's been eating me up, and I need to tell someone."

Rachel stared at Phoebe, awash with confusion. "Uh, sure, babe. What's the deal?"

Phoebe fiddled with her hands a bit. "You know how I'm always talking about my past lives? They're not. I'm actually immortal."

"Okay," Rachel chuckled. "If you say so."

"Are you seriously telling me that you don't believe me?!" Phoebe's shrill outcry was heavily laced with umbrage. "I came to you and poured out my soul, and you can't be bothered to even believe a word I've said?"

"Sorry, but I don't. To be honest," Rachel pointed out, "you're always saying weird stuff like this. I've started to sort of tune you out, now and then."

Gritting her teeth, Phoebe stomped over to the kitchen area. Pans and dishes and cutlery banged around, until she returned. In her hands was a large butcher's knife.

Now, Rachel grinned nervously. While Phoebe wasn't the type to snap, she couldn't always be predicted. "Uhm, what're you doin', there?"

In response, her friend slashed at her own arm. Blood briefly gushed out, only for the wound to heal itself under Rachel's sickened gaze. Her stomach churned and flopped, and she rushed for the bathroom.

"There! Now you'll believe me," Phoebe growled, the words barely reaching Rachel's ears. "I didn't want to go to extremes, but I don't like being doubted."

Slowly, Rachel staggered back out, slumping on the sofa. She wiped away a thin, chilly sheen of perspiration.

"My God," she muttered, her voice weak. "I can't believe you did that. Why did you tell me, of all people?"

"Because nobody would ever believe you, either," Phoebe blankly replied.

The umbrage and the shoe now on the other foot, Rachel passed out.

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